A New Year State of Mind
New year resolutions usually compel us to think about what we can do better than what we have done. Most people I know don’t create a new year resolution with glee and excitement.
New year resolutions usually compel us to think about what we can do better than what we have done. Most people I know don’t create a new year resolution with glee and excitement.
…I don’t think heroines choose to be one, they become one. For my Chinese mother, her heroism grew from her wanting to count as someone, in part because it’s who she is, in part because she’s come from a line of strong women who were so constrained by the limits set by their culture…
Recently I came across a situation that “woke” me up from my cultural assumptions as an American. I was purchasing an item at a convenience store where the person behind the counter was of South Asian descent. It was just the two of us, a slow pace in the store. As I was putting my change away, he sneezed. Without pause, I said “God bless you”. And without pause, he continued attending to his business…
It’s a unique experience for each woman who faces this point in their life. The breadth of choices and considerations. Fears and hopes. Looking back and looking forward. Consequences. Trade-offs. Our world of career (especially for us overachieving types) can suddenly collide with our hopes (and fantasy) of motherhood.
There’s something magical about sharing the contours of our deepest thoughts, hopes and fears with lifelong friends; friends whom you trust, with whom you share similar core values.
We are all human beings, seeking responses for our actions. When we don’t talk about the progress we’ve made at a team meeting, the team doesn’t respond with an understanding of our humility and recognize the work that’s been done. Instead, we are met with puzzlement, disinterest and distance. We become invisible. We’re the ATM of professional work. The machine.
“In times of difficulties, we must not lose sight of our achievements.” Choose to remember the good, choose optimism, possibility and joy…
Perhaps one of the most confounding aspects of American culture for international students and professionals is our habit of “small talk”. Well, American small talk is not about the conversation’s content. Small talk is a way for us to feel comfortable with others when we first meet, to address the awkwardness of silence in the initial meeting.
Have you ever noticed that when you talk about your professional life to others, you talk about your “job”, “how’s your job going?”, “are you looking for a job?”. I was talking to someone the other day during which she lamented that too many young people are using their college education to prepare for a job as opposed to understanding themselves and the world so they can find a profession that is really right for them. I thought that was a keen observation.